Friends are the best

I just wanted to say a few more things about friends. I haven't really ever had friends. I had a best friend in high school. Notice how I said a best friend which means one. I had a few other friends, only one best friend. She moved away to another town that is about 3 hours from here. She has a big house, what looks like to be she is very financially set, runs her own company or her husbands, and we just stopped being in touch much or having anything in common. I have had a few friends through the years at jobs. Just like I do now. But when you change jobs I thinks it's pretty normal to lose contact with each other or to make time for each other. I have never really had a good friend in my ward. I never feel adequate enough. Like they are just being 'nice' to me. They don't really want me to sit by them in Relief Society. To keep good friends everyone needs to make a good effort on seeing each other or talking to each other on the phone. It's easy to get too busy or so we think we are. Or we don't know what to talk about anymore. We might not have too many things in common. I have some really good friends at work. I love them so much. I was really down about a week ago and when I walked into work and saw my friends I just cried on their shoulders. I feel I am good at letting friends talk to me about their problems and I try to support them. It's hard for me to really believe they want to hear about my problems though. I am very insecure about myself. My really good friend, Windi is coming over tomorrow and she is going to fix us breakfast, take me to pay the dentist and then I am going to hang out with her while she does meals on wheels. I am hoping that doing things with my friends and getting out of the house, out of my rut it will help my downness. If I wait until my house is totally perfect and clean and organized and I have watched all my shows that I have recorded or being on the internet I will never do anything with friends. Friends need to be squeezed in! It's good for the soul.